I guess I no longer be the same, not only less cheerful, less simple but more quiet as well. And the reason was simple, I'm no longer naive & simple, I throughly see the ugly side of humans & seriously I HATE IT TO CORE! Y must u ugly people spoil the innocent & simple-minded people?!! Does really doing this u makes u happy?!! I seriously suggest u see PSYCHIATRIST, u are SICK! U know?? Well, it doesn't matter, no ones like to admit they are sick or crazy even though they are one, haha.

I remembered I told one of my guy friend all this prob & guess what he say?? He said: "Jaslin, u've really grow up & I'm so happy for you." I was like "hEy I telling u all this prob & can u be more serious?!!!" He laughed & continue saying: "Yes, I'm being serious with u too & I'm really happy." My facial expression (-_-)"' Anyway, thinking back, maybe I really grow up if not not I won't be thinking complicated and live simple.

Anyway I've to thanks these ugly side of people cause u made naive people smart & I strongly believe in KARMA. There's a saying: "What's goes around comes around" so it's only a matter of time. Another thing, because of these ugly people, ugly stuff, I lost trust in people. Not only that I learned to be Independence, same goes to relationship as well. After been through all the hurts, I dare not love again. Even though I have someone in mind, I dare not confessed & don't have the courage as well. "I'm Useless right?" I always thinking myself like this. It no longer matters who walk beside me & end the journey because I can't even move the first step & haven't put all the past behind me. Even if I thought of trying, I'm afraid & the past experience keep taunting me. I dunno how, I really dunno..

And the someone in mind, I guess he also have someone else in mind too, the cycle just goes around. I remembered I had liked a guys for 2 years without him knowing & I guess this time round will be also like this. Sometimes I don't understand y, the person u really can click well & like can't be together and still I will still choose u. HAHA! B-) I wonder, what if I really confessed my feeling to u?? What your reaction is??Will u reject me?? Sometimes I just hope that u can feel it & know it without verbally saying out however I know we are impossible.

Haix.. So many things happen & tons of emotions but none be express out. How I wish just leave everything behind & MIA. I too exhausted but don't think so I can, my work place need me & I've 5 projects in my hands now, not to forget my roles as a daughter too. Worst still, ugly people & giving u all the shit, don't give a damn. I wish to give up eveything, can I?? *sigh. I think stop here ba, tat's all.

My question of what is friends...

I've questioning myself this question... What friends for & what does friendship means? Do u guys really believe true friends exist in this realistic world?? For me is a no-no. I find that in putting good words, friends are to help each other but in another words, friends are using each other, isn't it? Last time I used to be very good to all my friends but they prove me wrong by treating them right, shall I still have to be kind towards them? Well, it's a tough decision for me to decide.

Can we live without friends?? Been asking myself this question . Ive been thinking in future, we will each have our own lifestyle to live, do we really need friends? haha! I know what is friends about but I don't think in this world, friends exist. Sometimes I just love to isolate myself from others & people said" two heads is better than one" but I find that if no failure u will never learn & if so, what is think out of the box then??